Life Just Sucks
by TheTransfiguredCanary
Summary: <html><head></head>Harry believes that he's finally figured his life out. Sure he's leaving for a perilous unknown journey but at least he knows that doesn't he? And so he sits on July 25th under the impression that nothing surprising will happen… Life just sucks sometimes. p.S. This story can be found elswhere called "By Blood I Swear". It was in fact written by me so I am not plagiarizing.</html>


Harry sat staring out the window. He was leaving tomorrow for the burrow. Anything to get away from his uncle. Since he was young his uncle had revelled in the opportunity to beat and hit him. Harry couldn't remember a time when he didn't beat and hit him. When he was younger, say four or five, he had believed that it happened to everyone. Then he started grade school and realised otherwise. Families usually love their children, adopted or otherwise, and never beat them. Harry sighed and rubbed his shoulder gingerly. His uncle had dislocated it the evening previous. Harry's eyes stung with pain as he tried to fit it back into place. He gave up as then pain became unbearable. His eyes started to drift shut when a shadow crossed is window. A barn owl swung silently into the small bedroom and landed on the drifting teens knee. It screeched quietly and woke the young man. He groaned

"What do you want?" he asked. The owl lifted its parceled leg. Harry detached the letter he expected the owl to leave but it instead flew to the cage. Hedwig and it exchanged a few hooted words before the snowy scooted over for the barn. "Weird." Harry mumbled before he ripped off the envelope and read the letter

_Dearest Harry, _

_ It pains me terribly to write this knowing that when you read it I won't be living. I have known since our hiding that I would not live to see you grow. I love you my dearest. There is an illusion I must unmask. First: I Lily Sara Snape am in NO WAY married to that insufferable toe rag James Jonathan Potter. Second: I am married to Severus Tobias Snape quite happily. Thirdly: I would never in happy tidings shag with Potter… the scumbag. What Black sees in him I will never know. Fourthly: that being said you Harry SEVERUS SNAPE are no Potter. Dumbledore wanted to hide us away somewhere we'd be safe. He told us that it would be best if we alluded that you were James's kin and I his wife. So I ran away with him and left your father very unhappily. When you were born we were sure to hide the true date of your birth so that Severus would not be hurt any further then he already was. You were not born in July my love, you were born in June. June 30__th __1969. it was the happiest day of my life, I only wish your father could share it. Please my love. Cast away your probable hatred towards your father. He is truly a good man underneath._

_ Your mother,_

_ Lily_

_P.S. the owls name is winter wing. I had wished to give him to you when you became of age. He's yours now, use him well._

_P.P.S. I do hope you haven't had the insufferable toe rag's cloak while you were at school. It caused your father and I a whole lot of grief when we were younger._

Harry left his arm hang down beside him to let the whole situation sink in. 'I'm Dumbledore's murderer's son!' he clutched his chest and sank into the chair further 'I'm Snape's son!' he rocked back and forth then he threw the letter at the window. It floated rather then bounced as he hadn't balled it up and he saw the last postscript on the reverse side.

_P.P.P.S. the charm that makes you look like James will expire midnight on the day of your fake birth. I'm sorry my son. I did it to protect you and your father. God I hate James. He's a cruel, vain and egocentric man._

'It's official' Harry groaned as he let his head hit the desk painfully 'my life sucks.'

Severus woke with a snap in a cold sweat. 'damn it all!" he touched his forehead and grimaced. He had a horrible headache. 'past the grave the man haunts me still.' He had had another nightmare about the tower. Albus's pleading face begging him. How was he supposed to deny the man? He moaned into his hands. He blinked away coming tears. 'No!' he pulled at his hair 'you will not lose your composure.' Severus dragged himself up and poured himself a glass of elf made liquor. He pushed his thumb into his forehead several times before taking a sip of the amber liquid. 'curses to you Albus!' he thought angrily 'you and your lemon drops!' and barn owl swooped through his window. He groaned, believing it to be Lucius's owl, and tried to shoo the creature away

"away with you! I don… winter wing?" Severus asked suddenly recognising lily's old owl. She had taken it with her when she left him alone with a note. "where have you been foolish owl?" the bird landed on his shoulder and rubbed against his cheek, hooting happily. Severus smiled. Lily's bird had loved him as much as he thought she did. He frowned as memories of their times together replayed before him. Smiling in parks, laughing over ice cream. Many a kiss and bed shared. The day he proposed. Their wedding day. He whimpered and covered his face with his hands. He didn't need these memories attacking him. Winter wing hooted and nudged him with his leg. He looked at the letter. He didn't recognise the handwriting but there were many charms for disguising someone's hand. He ripped off the envelope and read

_Father,_

_ I have to speak to you about a very important and urgent matter. Meet me on Magnolia crescent, surrey tonight at midnight. Please come alone. I will be myself._

_ Your son_

Severus was lost and little more then confused. He had a son? Did lily hide that from him too? He couldn't imagine that she would want to keep his spawn. Perhaps his son had been put up for adoption and had finally tracked him down. He had stressed that he would be there alone. Does he know about what I am? Severus nauseated at the thought of his son being afraid of him 'damn you albus!' Severus checked the clock and realised he had but minutes before this meeting. He flew up to him room donning the most casual rode he owned, which turned out to be his teaching robes, and left his home. He walked out of his anti appiration wards wondering rather pointless things. 'Does he look like me? Oh god he better not have my nose.' He paused before appirating and sighed 'lily. What did I do to hurt you so much that you'd leave and take that… man as your husband? How did he love you that I didn't?' Severus turned on his heal and apperated to their meeting place. He waited watching his watch as the seconds ticked by. At midnight he heard a coughing noise followed by retching in the back alley. The young man who stepped out was undistinguishable in the flickering light of the streetlamps. 'please don't let my son be a drug addict, I'd die.' Severus pleaded with the heavens. The boy turned and Severus saw his shoulder sink. It was then that he realised the other was at an odd angle and looked swollen even from here. Severus swallowed and chanced a few words.

"s…son?" he asked shakily

"yeah, I'm here father." Harry said loudly. Severus blanched. He knew that voice anywhere. Harry potter had tricked him.

Chap 2

"I should have known." Severus said whipping out his wand. He pointed it at Harry's chest and stepped forward "when is the order coming?"

"They're not. I'm leaving the burrow tomorrow night but that's different. I told you I would come alone and I have kept my word. Please lower your wand, I'm in no state to duel properly. Yes I understand the foolishness of leaving a place unable to protect my self but I had hoped that you would keep your word." Harry said calmly. Severus looked at the boy and realised that he was covered in bruises of many different colours and sizes.

"what happened to you?"

"what do you mean?" Harry asked

"you look like you've been run over by a herd of angry hippogryphs!" Severus said gesturing to Harry's face and shoulder

"worse, I was mauled by an angry walrus named Vernon." Harry said. Severus frowned and moved his wand to the young man's face. Harry flinched but did nothing to defend himself. Severus mumbled a few words and healed the bruises on his face.

"I can look at your shoulder closer if you come and sit under the light." Harry smiled slightly and moved over to the street lamp. Severus pulled the overly large shirt over his shoulder. "your ligament has been badly strained from keeping it dislocated. I can pop it back into place but it may hurt rather a lot. I can give you a numbing potion if we find some place to lie down comfortably." Severus said. Harry thought before nodding and pulling the potion master's sleeve.

"this way. But when we get close to the house you have to be quiet. If my uncle hears you you'll end up something similar to me." Harry said before leading the way down the street.

"you uncle did this to you?" Severus asked. he wanted to know who did this to him. Son or not there was no way he could stand by and let child abuse happen. He had had he same thing happen to him. Harry was normal by sheer stubbornness if anything else.

"yeah. Since I've lived here. Sixteen years now." Harry said

"you don't turn seventeen until Wednesday potter." Severus said

"I turned seventeen last month." Harry said glumly. Severus felt his heart rip to pieces in his chest. Lily had cheated on him? She had slept with potter while they were married? He stopped and buried his eyes in his hand.

"Potter… everyone knows your birthday and as I last checked it was the thirty first of July"

"I was born a month before everyone thinks I was because mum didn't want you to think she cheated with James and stop calling me potter. I'm not one." Harry said angrily "oh and by the way every time you said I was just like my father you were insulting yourself." He huffed angrily and walked up the path. He opened and closed the door almost silently. Severus stood on the sidewalk in shock. Lily hadn't cheated on him? Harry was not a potter? insulting himself? Severus put two and two together covered his mouth with his hands. He looked around and stared at the air around him. Harry was ACCTUALLY his son?! He walked to the door and opened it silently. He closed it in equal volume and walked up the stairs. He put his ear to the first door and heard quiet sobbing. He cast a silencing charm around the door and knocked quietly.

"sh." Harry said quietly before opening the door. He wiped his cheeks and turned away.

"silencing charm." Severus said in a normal volume. Harry sniffed and winced holding his shoulder. "here. Lie down. I'll fix your shoulder." Harry lay down and lay his head away from the problem. "take this, it's a numbing potion." He downed it and hissed.

"it's all tingly."

"that's normal." Severus said he held the two bones firmly and pushed. There was a loud pop as the shoulder was replaced. Harry grimaced at the sound but felt no pain. "we'll have to put it into a sling for the next week while it heals. Take this tonight. It'll help with the healing." Severus said. Suddenly he noticed winter wing and Hedwig hooting quietly to each other. "how did you come by winter wing?"

"he came with mum's letter. It's on the desk if you want to read it. " Harry said shifting himself awkwardly with one arm in sitting position. Severus grabbed it and read. As he reached the bottom of the page he looked mournfully as her signature. She had loved him after all. She had hated James all that time. He sighed and flipped it over.

"ah." He said placing the letter on the bedside table again.

"yeah. What a shock it'll be to my friends when I wake up on august first not Harry." he said in annoyance

"you'll still be Harry. You just won't look like Harry…for now… pray to the gods you don't get your father's nose." Harry snorted and laughed. Severus smiled and stifled a yawn. "go to bed. It's nearly one." Severus said Harry tried to hide a yawn, and failed miserably, before moaning as the potions master forced him to lie down "sleep you brat." Severus laughed. Harry smiled before snuggling into his blankets and drifting off. Severus conjured a bed and closed the slightly open door. He lay down and fell to sleep almost instantly after his head hit the pillow

he was in a field of grass standing apparently alone when Albus walked up and smiled next to him.

"you knew." Severus realised

"of course I knew. I was just waiting for you to know too."

"why did she run?"

"she was trying to protect you and her son. If he had found out that you had sired a child with her you all would have perished. She loved her son and you more then even life itself."

"why James?"

"He was trying to regain Sirius's attention. He had hoped that if Sirius saw him with someone else he might realise what he was missing. Add the fact he was on his way to becoming head arror, she believed he'd be able to protect them, and he was…until then."

"fool."

"well when one is in love one does foolish things. Had I not warned you that marrying lily was not the best of idea's?"

"yes. But you also said that love is the most powerful force in the world."

"and it is. But sometimes one must refuse that which they love most for the greater good."

" Albus… I don't care about the happiness of the masses if I am doomed to be unhappy forever."

"ah but you are not doomed forever my boy. You have your son. now he shall have the power that the dark lord knows not."

"and that is?"

"parental support." Albus said before turning away with a smile as Severus snapped awake

"Sir? Sir. Professor Snape." Harry poked his shoulder. His eyes snapped open and he turned onto his back. He looked up at his sons face and realised he had more bruises

"what happened?"

"my uncle saw you and got really upset." Harry paraphrased. He touched his face and winced. "he doesn't like wizards very much. Plus he thought you were some creep I brought off the street. Then he realised I snuck out and… yeah. A lot of stuff happened." Harry said before taking the ice he had and putting it on his face again. Severus growled and turned his son's face. He healed it with the wave of his wand.

"you can't let him push you around Harry! stand up for yourself! You're a perfectly capable wizard! You can't let him walk all over you like this!" Severus huffed. Harry looked at him wearily and stared at his feet.

"you don't now how intimidating he is."

"I'm sure when I meet him I will. Harry… I went through the exact same situation when I was your age. I know that it can seem hard to stand up for yourself but if you let this happen it won't end well. Promise me that you at least try and defend yourself." Harry looked at him and sighed

"the last time I tried to defend myself I ended up in the hospital in a coma for six weeks." Harry said. Severus choked and grabbed his son's shoulder.

"tell me your joking." Harry swallowed and shook his head. Severus stood and withdrew his wand. "Harry. come with me." He said before exiting the room

"wait. No. no wait." Harry whimpered before following. Then reach the first floor in light but soundly footfalls.

"boy! Who said you could come downstairs!" Vernon roared before stepping out of the living room. Harry was clinging to his father for dear life.

"hello Mr. Dursley. Apparently you have been terrorizing my son." Severus said walking forward slowly. Vernon stumbled back into the living room. Dudley leaned back as far as he could into the couch and clutched his bottom. Petunia dropped what she was cooking and gasped

"Severus? What are you doing here?" she asked. Severus held up a finger to silence her before turning back to Vernon

"now…"

"Vernon." Petunia supplied. Severus nodded in thanks.

"now Vernon. You are never again… and I repeat never again going to touch a hair on Harry's head or so help me god and Albus Dumbledore I will turn you inside out and feed you to Lucius Malfoy in a casserole do I make myself clear?" Vernon Dursley could care less who Lucius Malfoy was but he could tell it was someone unpleasant. This man was terrifying and obviously bent on protecting the useless whelp

"thought that old man said your godfather was dead?" he said to Harry

"Sirius black is dead. I'm not Harry's godfather. I'm his actual father." Severus said. Petunia made a noise, which he silenced once more, Vernon choked.

"what is wrong with you freaks and staying six feet under!" he shouted. Severus pointed his wand strait at Vernon's nose.

" now Mr. Dursley are we clear that you won't ever hurt my son again?" Severus asked slowly. Vernon nodded. "your lying." Severus said as his wand tip glowed dangerously.

"yeah, well what are you doing to do about it?" Vernon said before spitting in the wizards face. Harry grimaced and made a hissing noise. Severus blinked and glared. Vernon suddenly realised he had crossed an unspoken line. In twenty minutes he was being bodily thrown from his home with everything deemed belonging to him. The wizard watched him go glaring all the way. When at last Vernon Dursley was gone Severus nodded in satisfaction and returned to the house.

"petunia. It was been about seventeen years hasn't it." Severus said accepting the cup of tea that she offered

"so…you're Harry's father?" petunia asked.

"yes… speaking of fathers… is your boy to be trusted?"

"well… he wouldn't cause nearly as much damage as Vernon. I'll watch him."

"good. Lily hid the truth from me using a combination of heartbreak and magic."

"she was quite good at breaking boys hearts."

"yes she was." He said sipping his tea. "I'm glad that I could be here for him."

"why couldn't you be?" she asked with confusion

"you don't know do you?" she shook her head "I killed albus Dumbledore."

"you did what!" she asked placing her cup rather forcefully on the table

"ugh. Even muggles have cursed me." Severus said holding his head in his hands. Petunia looked at him with pursed lips and said nothing. "He begged me to."

"ah." Then she paused "you do know that assisted suicide is still considered manslaughter right.'

"he was dieing of illness. If I did not kill him he would have been dead by now anyway."

"ahh."

"I'm surprised that Harry still excepts me. Albus was as much his mentor as mine."

"perhaps that is why he excepts you." Petunia said finishing her tea "you have a lot more in common then you think Sev."


End file.
